the monochrome trips.
hello , i am trippin.it’s because i am like this.
i am fickle and impulsive but i always know for a fact that i am either this or that.
i border only along the extremities. i cant stand for ambiguity.
ambiguity’s beauty lies in the mystery but i have always stood for definition and clarity.
life’s too short, i need to live and love with everything i have got and hate with all my guts.
no more wasted breaths and long regrets.
hey.
it is such a pity that it took me so long to realize that are friends who genuinely care, and others, who are really just too self absorbed and negative.
and i would say back to these very people that i used to care about so darn much,
“seriously? if you cant already tell.
.
.
.
i have outgrown you already.”
who am i kidding.
we play with toy soldiers no more.
the thing about technology is, it doesnt just bridge the spatial distances between 2 person, it brings you back in time into memories of people who once meant the world to you.
Today,i stumbled upon his writings,his stories and his pictures. and i cant help but to recall watching his back as he left in a cab,never to look back again.he was broken and wrought with his struggles of his perceived reality, of his loved ones and of his identity. Perhaps, it’s was also his moroseness then that drew me so deeply into what we thought was “us”. With everything i had and i was, I tried to fix him,or i naively thought i could.
and that remained as a empty page of my(our) story till today. 5 years on, as a grown adult looking at the juxtaposition of then and now, i cant help but to ask ,” Have you tried being happy for yourself, just even once? “
or
.
.
.
.
.
“Is it that cool to be angsty still?”
A guy finds out that his girlfriend of 5 years is cheating. So, he calls a local radio station to dump his cheating girlfriend on the air. The girlfriend thinks she is being proposed
to.
(via lauren)
-no one likes to be on the see saw alone.-
Can you ever give up on someone who has never once given up on you?
i suppose, if you have got a heart, the answer is “no.”
::travelogue 2011::
to mark the end of my 4 years in varsity and my 20th country travelled in 4 years.
i am counting my blessings really,despite being a very poor but happy girl!
at 11.45 pm last night,as mum was getting ready for bed.
me: ” mummy..i am hungry.did you buy anything?”
mum :” mmhm..there’s fruitcake and milk.”
me:”narh.. its okaye.”
and she got up and cooked a bowl of noodles for me despite my insistence that she should not bother and should rest.
it didnt had much, just an egg.
but,as i ate the noodles alone, and everything seemed to stand to halt , i realised mothers are really more deserving of everything that we can ever give.
as i write this, i found a post it note on the floor behind the door,timed 0530am ” darlinggirl, i just bought milk from 7-11. please have your cocopops and milk before going to sch.”
sighs.
-cowardice-
never have i wanted something that i haven’t got the courage to fight for it.
Travelogue 2011
Grad trip has been confirmed and booked! 11 countries in 30 days.
Netherlands.Belgium.Czech Republic.Austria.Hungary.Croatia.Bosnia & Herzegovina. Serbia.Montenegro.Albania.Greece.
Good sights,food and people await.
:D
you know relationships weaken you, and break away walls , when you are afraid of being alone for too long.
sometimes i think am so cheeky. it’s no wonder why all my boyfriends always thought that i am never up to any good.
theng.
these days , my life has been so complete with what i already have and will have in the future that i kind of really know how it feels when people say ’ nothing else matters anymore .’
it feels even more grounded, when a lot of this contentment is knowing that you want to a part of this too.
=)
life or death.
tonight, i watched a video from wikileaks on the atrocities and of collateral murders by US soldiers. it was difficult to watch. as i grew older, i was getting more adept at being too self serving to care about other people, people who had families, who had a life( like i did ). afterall, what can i do?
it was a long while that i grew up feeling undeserving,having soliloquies with myself about existentialism, beating myself up for being where i am,and of who i have.for all the times that i may be envious of others, there are times more often than not that i know,deep inside, i am very much more privileged than others-to have a choice at where i am,of who i am,of who i want to be,whilst others are indiscriminately,dying and suffering at where they may be, who they are ,who they may ever be, all without a choice.
why am i more deserving that others to have what i have?
why am i not in their place?
i cant get pass the realisation of life being just a fancy clockwork of the puppeteer and his puppets-we being the helpless puppets.i am not implying here, that god is the puppeteer neither am i ever going to subscribe to nietzsche’s nihilism.what i am struggling here,tonight, is the selflessness of man- the specks of dusts in an infinitum, to ever make a difference, to ever make life or,for that matter, death worthwhile.
so what, now?
Nooooo! Nooo, nooo!
So there was this girl,and this keyboard odyssey on a literary invasion. She thinks in incoherent sentences, and murders the english language.he assumes as a double spy , rides the universe with his magic unicorn, eating his favourite NTUC hot and spicy chips.
the end//
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